My Waterloo

An advance apology for those who are here for pictures of Evangeline. I've had something percolating for a while that I need to get off my chest, so this post is sadly Evangeline-free. We've been living in Hong Kong for well over a year, so I feel comfortable saying that I really like it here. Walking through our village a few months ago, I caught myself looking at the busy streets with a surprising amount of affection: everyone in parkas even though it was 65 degrees, huge bamboo steamers filled with dim sum, grandmas rifling through bins of sweet potatoes. These people may be crazy sometimes, but I have come to love them.

Without a doubt, it's been hardest to adapt to the pushiness and rudeness that one encounters on a daily basis. I think I've referred to this before, but most people in Hong Kong have a me-first attitude that can be baffling and infuriating. They take up elevator space at the expense of those in wheelchairs, push and shove and cut in line to get on to the MTR, and often pretend to not see the elderly and disabled who could really use a seat on the train or the bus. Perhaps the funniest thing to me are the people living in our building who intentionally close the elevator doors on others. I mean, these are your neighbors that you're going out of your way to inconvenience. You're going to see them again, and wouldn't you want them to hold the elevator for you?

My best coping mechanism, beside a sense of humor, has been to adjust my expectations. If you don't expect the people around you to be courteous, it isn't nearly as frustrating when they're not. And when someone actually goes out of their way to hold the elevator for you, or gives up their seat when you're carrying both a tired child and a bag of groceries, you feel blessed by the milk of human kindness. Managed expectations take so much annoyance out of life.

But there was still one thing that was really hard for me to let go of, and it might seem surprising to you: turnstiles. Most of the turnstiles in the MTR stations are automatic; you beep your card on the reader and the little doors swoosh open so you can walk through. All stations have at least one extra-wide turnstile for people in wheelchairs and those with luggage or strollers. These turnstiles are activated on either side, so both people who are exiting and those who are entering can use the same one. When I am pushing Evangeline in the stroller, I almost always choose to go through the wide one. Yes, the stroller fits through the standard size, but it's easier to go through the extra-wide, and perhaps more importantly, I feel like I deserve to go through it. And I always make a point to never go through the extra-wide when I'm not pushing the stroller, feeling superior that I'm leaving it open for someone who really needs it. Most of the time, this isn't a problem, but there was one place that turned out to be my nemesis.

In the East Tsim Sha Tsui station downtown, which we walk through every week to go to church, the turnstiles are (poorly) designed so that the closest one to the escalators from the arriving trains is the extra-wide. If you're trying to exit the station from the inside, you have to walk a little bit out of your way to get to a standard size turnstile, which is way too far for the average Hong Konger! So when a train arrives, there's usually a crowd of people trying to get through that single spot, and good luck to anyone on the other side who is trying to get in using that same turnstile.

My nemesis (on the left) in a calm moment from outside the station; there are more turnstiles off to the right

Being the occasionally stubborn and self-righteous person that I am, every week coming back from church I would try to battle my way through the extra-wide. As you can imagine, this would rarely end well. During the struggle to beep my card before the person did on the other end, my card would register but then the other person would walk through, messing my card up. I would have to go to the customer service kiosk to have my card reset in order to try again. Every time this happened, I would seethe with rage about how rude these people were, that they wouldn't let a woman with a child in a stroller through the turnstile that is especially made for wheelchairs and strollers. We deserved to use it, for crying out loud! One morning, I noticed that I was tensing up even before we got to the station, preparing myself for another ugly encounter, and that's when it hit me that I was still fighting Hong Kong. I was never going to win, no matter how many times I stood up for my "rights" and for the unwritten rules of a polite society. Seeing the usual crowd around the extra-wide, I said to Joseph, "Maybe I'll just use the regular ones that are out of the way." Joseph dryly replied, "Sounds like a good idea."

It might seem trivial to you, but it was important for me for me to admit defeat in my adaptation to the culture here, my Waterloo if you will..Hong Kong is tricky because on the surface, it is an extremely easy city for Westerners to live. I think you get lulled into a false sense of belonging, when in reality the local culture and attitude is quite different. Hong Kongers think their manners are infinitely superior to those of the mainland Chinese, but to a Western person, they don't seem that different. As uncivilized as they are to us, the rude behavior is acceptable here, and no amount of unpleasantness from me will alter that. I know that I have changed a little--I am definitely more pushy and have stopped apologizing when I brush past people. But I'm never going to stop doing all the things that normal Americans do, like stopping to help someone who just dropped the entire contents of their coinpurse on the sidewalk. My irrational hope is that these tiny acts of kindness will inspire others to be just a little bit nicer to the people around them. In any case, I'm just going to keep on being me, and Hong Kong can just keep on being itself, and that's finally okay.

Half Marathon and Lantern Festival

Joseph had been training all winter for the Hong Kong Standard Chartered Marathon (although he just did the half), which is the biggest race event here in Hong Kong. About a week and a half before the race, he turned his ankle when we were climbing on some rocks, and it was taking quite a while to heal. The day before the race he went for a short jog and decided that he would go for it. His ankle didn't hurt as long as he was going straight, so he decided to take it very slow on the curves and hope for the best.

The marathon and half marathon started at 6am downtown. One of our neighbors was also running the same race, so he and Joseph went down together with some other guys before the crack of dawn. Then Evangeline and I followed along later with the rest of our neighbor's family so we could see them finish, which was a lot of fun. I really wish I had taken more pictures, but it was so crowded and we were pretty preoccupied trying to keep track of our kids. I actually lost Evangeline in the crowd for about a minute, which was terrifying!

Joseph at the finish line, in the teal shirt and dark shorts

There he goes!

We were so excited that he finished. It was slower than he would have liked, about 1 hour and 50 minutes. He had been aiming for 1 hour and 42 minutes, but I think he did all right. :) The ankle held up fine. Joseph said that the biggest challenge was just how crowded the start was. It was a good 25 minutes into the race before things started to thin out enough to be comfortable, which is crazy. The route took them through the Western Tunnel under Victoria Harbor, so Joseph can now officially say that he ran under water! :) It is a big event here in Hong Kong, so it was fun to be a part of it.

Joseph feeling good!

The kids waiting for the dads after the race

Also that same weekend, Evangeline's school had a Lantern Festival to mark the end of Chinese New Year. The classes performed, with the younger kids singing traditional songs and the older kids reading poetry that they had written. We didn't understand any of it, of course, but it was still fun to watch all of the kids shine. We were proud that Evangeline was one of the few in her class to not have stage fright. She and one of her best friends, Man Ching, really put on a show for the audience. It was easy to see why they get along so well.

Evangeline and her class getting ready to sing

Man Ching and Evangeline bowing and shaking hands

Playing games at the carnival afterwards

Clowning around with Man Ching in the music room

Our dragon girl

Year of the Snake

Happy New Year! We have been enjoying our second Lunar New Year here in Hong Kong. The weather this year is sunny and gorgeous. It was a little chilly in the morning of the first day (Sunday), but aside from that we've been very lucky.

Evangeline had a lot of fun at her school leading up to the New Year break. On the day before the school holidays, they had a celebration and encouraged the children to wear traditional Chinese clothes. There is a family down the street whose daughter goes to the same school, and although she's two years older, she and Evangeline have become "bus friends." Her mom gave us one of her old outfits for Evangeline to wear, which was so special.

On Saturday, the day before the first day, we went to the big New Year market in Victoria Park on Hong Kong Island. Last year we went very early, before all of the stalls were open, so this year we took our time and had brunch first, so we didn't get there until around 11am. Wow, was it packed! It was too crowded for Joseph, so we didn't stay long, but it was fun to be in the middle of the big spectacle for a while.

Cherry blossoms and orchids

Checking out some blooms

My personal favorite, kumquat bushes!

Big steamer of dumplings

Evangeline eating a gai daan jai, which is a puffy egg waffle

We decided to take advantage of the lovely weather on the second day and go for a hike in Plover Cove Country Park, which is in northeast Hong Kong, close to the border with China. There is a bus that runs right up to a local landmark called Bride's Pool, but only on holidays. Perfect! Once you are there, there are several easy trails that are just right for a small child. It was so nice to leave the bustle of the city behind for a few hours. Evangeline asked soon after we got there, "Why is it so quiet?"

On the trail

By a scenic waterfall

Holes carved out by water

Happy hiker

And just like last year, I think Evangeline's favorite event was the Lion Dance here at our housing estate. It feels very special to be up so close to the action, although maybe not so good for our ears. :)

With the lions before they got going

Evangeline and one of her friends, Alice

Percussionists at work

One of the lions jumping on the posts

The lions address the crowd

Family shot after the performance

So far, so good in the Year of the Snake!

Bali

Bali definitely lived up to the hype. We spent Christmas there, accompanied by our good friend Steve, and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. I don't think I've ever been anywhere that was so overtly geared toward tourists, but when you have beautiful beaches, lush vegetation, amazing culture, and friendly people, it's no wonder that the whole world wants to come and be a part of it.

Our trip started out in the south of the island in Sanur. We had picked the location for the child-friendly beach, and sure enough, the water was incredibly still, almost like a lake.

Nothing better than eating literally on the beach!

It's also a convenient way to entertain your child while you enjoy your food...

...and the sunset

We took a morning trip to the nearby capitol of Denpasar to take in the national museum and one of the big markets. The museum's best feature was its architecture--beautiful!

A couple was getting wedding pictures done here--good choice!

The major indoor market

Offerings for purchase

Back at the beach, locals enjoying the water

Beach bums

We really enjoyed the food, which was fresh and healthy, and very cheap. It was easy to be vegetarian there; every restaurant had meatless dishes, and tofu and tempeh are part of normal life for the Balinese.

This place's version of gado-gado, a kind of salad with peanut dressing

There was loads of fresh fruit and spices, since both thrive in that climate. I had some delicious drinks with lemongrass and ginger, and once I had turmeric sorbet! It was an experience. :)

Also, Bali is known for its spas and massages. We fell into a routine starting the very first day: after lunch when Evangeline would go down for her nap, we would take turns going to get massages. The cheapest we saw was around $6 USD for an hour--crazy! My favorites were the hot stone massages that I had. Another highlight was a 2 hour treatment including a body scrub, body mask, and traditional Balinese massage. Bliss!

We headed inland to Ubud for the next stage of our trip. Ubud is considered to be the cultural center of Bali, the home of countless artists and performers. There were literally ten or more performances happening every single night in Ubud, and the amount of stores selling woodwork, paintings, textiles, jewelry, and stonework was overwhelming. I especially liked the food in Ubud; there was a real emphasis on organic, and it was also very creative. The place we stayed was really special, a group of eco cottages in a gorgeous setting.

Our cottage

The organic garden, which supplied the restaurant

Petting the bunnies. There were also a bunch of goats!

Evangeline, of course, loved the pool the best

My favorite massages were here at the in-house spa

Ubud is known for its beautiful terraced rice paddies, as well. One morning we took a hike on the outskirts of town. It was hot but the views and the experience was well worth it.

Families bring their ducks to the paddies for the day, then bring them home at night

As you can imagine, Evangeline just loved them

A food stand where the man hacked open a young coconut for me

And it even had a swing!

I definitely earned my daily massage over the course of the morning

Rice paddy fam

The patio of this restaurant was right next to a rice paddy

My pictures of the traditional dance I went to turned out terribly, I'm afraid. I only took a few, and I don't know much about outdoor night photography. :) The performance was spellbinding, though. Something I'll never forget!

The gamelan accompaniment was on both sides of the "stage," Ubud Palace

But I think the main highlight for all of us was the trip we took to the Elephant Safari Park in the hills north of Ubud. Elephants are not native to Bali, but the ones from this park were rescued from logging camps in Sumatra, where they are a critically endangered species. Although not truly a preserve, since the elephants are still "working," at least they have a safe environment and seemed to be enjoying themselves. There were about 30 elephants of various ages, including three small ones that were born at the park a few years ago. It was incredible to be able to be so close to these amazing, gentle creatures.

These gals want some food!

Feeding them pieces of coconut palm

Trunk shot

Evangeline was in heaven; she could have fed them all day!

Me and a new friend

Evangeline with a three year-old male, Handsome

We also got to take a ride on the elephants through the nearby jungle. It was amazing, and also a good opportunity to talk to the handlers and learn about the lives of the elephants. Evangeline and I were on Ryan, a 15 year-old male who had been at the park for about seven years. The park has each elephant paired with a special handler who is with them all the time. Ryan and his handler had been together since the day he arrived from Sumatra. Steve and Joseph were on Miki, an older female who had given birth at the park about three years ago. We definitely noticed the difference in personalities between Ryan and Miki over the course of the ride. Ryan was a lot friskier and more vocal, which was fun to see.

Ryan strikes a pose

At the end of the ride, the elephants got to play in the pond a little bit

Ryan had fun cheekily spraying the bystanders

I wish I had taken a picture of the "wall of fame" inside the main building at the park. They had pictures of all the celebrities who had been there, which was hilarious. Not only had the park hosted A-listers like Julia Roberts and David Beckham, they had also had Dolph Lundgren pay them a visit! But seriously, we had such a good time and will always remember it. We had to practically drag Evangeline away!

Our last stop in Bali was Balangan Beach, in the far southwest of the island. We had a morning flight for our departure and wanted to be in reasonable driving distance from the airport. It was interesting to think about what that area would look like in another 20 years. Currently it isn't heavily developed, with the cliffs above the beach dotted with small operations like bungalows and guesthouses. Our bungalow was right next to a cow pasture, and we had groups of chickens and roosters wandering around

Steve hits the beach

Evangeline and me playing in the waves

What could be more fun than being buried in the sand?

Happy faces

The rough life

Joseph goes in for a dip

Dinner at the beach

Surfers at sunset

After the sun went down the clouds all turned pink--gorgeous!

The Jones Fam doesn't want to go home!

Truly, we were sad to go. I can see why there is such a large expat population in Bali, and so many people on extended vacations. We did a lot, but we barely scratched the surface. It's a good reason to go back, right? :)